escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
