This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
