how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize