I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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