So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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