you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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