He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
