i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize