he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
