"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
