I feel like abortions should bother me more
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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