I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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