I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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