Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
How drunk are you?
Completed.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
