Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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