Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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