I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
