I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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