why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
