I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
