This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
