How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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