I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
