His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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