I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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