There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
