I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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