so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
