Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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