so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
