Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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