I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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