Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
