I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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