best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
