How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
