I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
