Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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