I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
