i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
