I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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