goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
