It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
