ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
