Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
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