Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Randomize
