where does the pee come out of this thing
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
