Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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