I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
