I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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