I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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