Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
